Jack Shaw showing off his latest political protege

The rotting, battered carcass of a dead humpback whale that washed ashore on Monmouth Beach was elected mayor of Hoboken, replacing the city’s prior leader who resigned after being arrested in a massive corruption scandal.

The whale, which did not respond to repeated requests for comment, was elected with 95 percent of the vote, according to election officials. Voter turnout was high, with 97 percent of registered voters casting their ballot, despite no advance public notice about the election.

“We’re certain this was a clean and fair election with no irregularities,” city clerk James Farina said moments after the polls closed, which was just 3 minutes after they opened. “Once again, the citizens of Hoboken exercised their voting rights with enthusiasm and showed why this city is a shining example of democracy in action for not only the rest of the state, but also the nation.”

The mayor’s post became available after the resignation of Peter Cammarano III, who is one of dozens charged in a federal political corruption case. The whale apparently became a lock after political consultant Jack Shaw attached himself to the marine mammal’s campaign.

Shaw was found dead the same day the dead whale was elected.

“Jack wasn’t a show-off, but he said to me, ‘I’ve got Hudson County so locked down, I could even get a putrid, decaying whale carcass elected,’” a friend recalled. “I said, ‘I bet you can’t.’ Boy was I wrong. Do you smell something?”

Joseph Coniglio and the "Pierre"

Jurors in former state senator Joseph Coniglio’s political corruption case cleared him of mail fraud and extortion charges, but convicted the Democrat and his toupee of conspiracy and other counts not actually contained in the indictment.

As the court clerk read through the verdict form, Coniglio began crying quietly. His hairpiece showed no reaction.

The federal jury in Newark did not seem bothered by the fact it convicted the Bergen County resident and his hairpiece of charges that weren’t part of the original indictment, including criminal impersonation, assault and torture.

“We read the law. What Mr. Coniglio did in that courtroom for three weeks, by forcing us to look at the dead squirrel slapped on his skull and act like he had a full, natural head of hair, clearly constitutes torture,” jury forewoman Nancy Blanchard said. “I, for one, would rather be water boarded at some black site CIA prison in Uzbekistan.”

Several jurors who spoke after the verdict pointed to federal criminal code, Title 18, Chapter 113C, which describes torture as “an act committed by a person …specifically intended to inflict severe physical or mental pain or suffering upon another person within his custody or physical control.”

The hairpiece, a helmet of synthetic fibers parted on the left side (and only the left side) and made to appear to be graying, is befitting a man of Coniglio’s stature and 66 years. Receipts introduced at trial indicate the former plumber purchased his “Pierre” toupee from BestWigOutlet.com, for $371.25.

“I’m pretty sure I saw it lunge at one of the prosecutors during closing arguments,” juror Brad Andrews said. “But a bailiff kind of pointed to his service weapon and the hairpiece settled down.”

Jurors said they spent little time deliberating on the original charges the government brought against Coniglio, who was accused of accepting a consulting job for $5,000 a month at Hackensack University Medical Center while using his influence on the senate budget committee to funnel more than $10 million in state money to the hospital.

“This is New Jersey,” forewoman Blanchard said. “Who are we to deprive marginally qualified state politicians the right to participate in and take advantage of the Jersey dream?”